What Are Post-Wedding Blues?

Struggling with post-wedding blues? Learn why couples feel a sense of sadness after the wedding day and discover practical ways to ease the letdown, strengthen your marriage, and embrace everyday life as newlyweds.

For many couples, the joy, anticipation, and excitement of celebrating a wedding with family, friends, and loved ones create unforgettable memories. After months (or even years) of wedding planning, the big day finally arrives, and it often goes by quickly. But once the wedding and honeymoon are over, it can be difficult to go back to their everyday life. This unexpected wave of sadness, known as the post-wedding blues, is common and can be hard to overcome. Here is a deeper look into what post-wedding blues are, why they happen, and practical ways to cope with the emotions to help the transition from a major life event into a happy, healthy marriage.

What are post-wedding blues?

The term post-wedding blues describes the feelings of emptiness or sadness that some people experience in the weeks or months after their wedding. It can feel surprising– after all,  weddings are often called  “the happiest day of your life”. But the reality is that the high level of attention, activity, and planning leading up to the big day can make returning to normal routines feel like a major letdown. In some cases, these emotions can resemble mild depression, making it important to recognize the signs early and take the steps to find balance again.

What are the signs of post-wedding blues?

Some cases of post-wedding blues are stronger than others. Some may experience them pretty intensely, while others may not experience them at all. Here are the main signs of post-wedding blues to look out for.

1. A sense of emptiness after the celebrations

2. Deep sadness when looking back at wedding photos or videos

3. Lack of motivation at work or at home

4. Missing the anticipation of the wedding countdown

5. Feeling disconnected as a married couple in everyday life

Why do post-wedding blues happen?

A wedding isn’t just a one-day event; it’s often years of preparation. From choosing venues to sending invitations, the process can take over one’s entire routine. Here are some common reasons why couples face post-wedding blues.

1. The end of wedding planning

For months, someone was busy making lists, meeting vendors, and discussing ideas for the ceremony and reception.  When that’s all over, and without a plan to focus on, it’s easy to feel a void.

2. Loss of anticipation

Weddings often come with lots of anticipation. Every decision builds toward the big day, and then, in a flash, it’s done. That emotional crash can leave a person feeling a lack of motivation due to the loss of a deadline. 

3. A major life event transition

Getting married is one of the biggest milestones in a person’s life. Like moving into a new house or changing careers, it marks a transition. Even when positive, such large changes can spark feelings of sadness or anxiety from leaving a part of their life behind.

4. Return to everyday life

After the honeymoon, the normal life routines of cooking, commuting, and paying bills quickly return. The contrast between the glamor of the wedding and the realities of everyday life can intensify the letdown.

5. The spotlight moves on

During the wedding, all of the attention is focused on one person/couple. Afterward, that focus from family, friends, and a larger social circle shifts away, which some people may find unexpectedly difficult.

How long do post-wedding blues last?

For most people, the emotional feelings fade after a few weeks or within a month as they settle into married life. However, if the deep sadness lingers for months to a year, or begins to interfere with work, relationships, or health, it may signal more serious depression. In that case, seeking support from a professional can make a big difference.

How to cope with post-wedding blues

For those struggling with sadness after getting married, it’s important to remember that they’re not alone. Many people have a hard time with the transition. Here are some strategies for handling and helping to embrace the new chapter as a married couple.

1. Focus on the marriage, not just the wedding

One way to ease the post wedding blues is by shifting the focus from the wedding day to the journey of the new marriage. Instead of dwelling on the end of the planning and celebration, look ahead by setting goals, starting new traditions, or creating simple evening rituals like cooking dinner or taking walks together. Building these shared moments gives people fresh anticipation and helps replace any feelings of emptiness with a deeper connection as a married couple.

2. Create new plans together

The end of wedding planning can often leave people feeling restless. To avoid feeling down and to keep the mind occupied, channel that energy into new projects. Whether it’s redecorating the house, planning a weekend trip, or mapping out the next vacation, having something to plan gives people a sense of anticipation and helps ease the post-wedding blues.

3. Stay connected with loved ones

One reason post-wedding blues feel so intense is the sudden drop in social interaction. During wedding prep, most people speak with every family member, friend, and vendor regularly. To avoid feelings of isolation, one should make an effort to keep that connection, such as scheduling dinners, game nights, or phone calls with family and loved ones.

4. Take personal time 

After months of planning and giving so much energy to the wedding day, it’s normal to feel like one has set aside their own needs, making self-care time an important step in easing the post-wedding blues. One can reconnect with hobbies they enjoy, return to a fitness routine, or spend quiet evening moments journaling or reading. These small acts of self-care not only help restore balance but also serve as a reminder that nurturing one’s own well-being strengthens the marriage and everyday life as part of a married couple.

5. Communication

Open communication is one of the most effective ways to cope with the post wedding blues. It’s important to share one’s feelings honestly with their spouse, even if they seem small or hard to put into words. Chances are, they may be experiencing similar sadness or a sense of letdown, but didn’t know how to bring it up. Furthermore, working through these moments together not only helps people adjust after the wedding day, but it also strengthens the foundation of the marriage.

How do you know when post-wedding blues will turn into something more serious?

While most people bounce back from post-wedding blues with time, in some cases, some may slip into ongoing depression, especially if one is prone to it or has a history of mental health struggles. Here are some signs to look out for that could mean more than just post-wedding blues.

1. Deep sadness lasting longer than a month

2. Difficulty functioning at work or at home

3. Loss of interest in things that were once enjoyed

4. Withdrawal from family and friends

If any of these symptoms sound familiar, it may be time to seek professional help. Talking with a therapist, counselor, or even a trusted family member can provide guidance and reassurance to get someone the support they need. 

How Charlie Health can help

If you or a loved one is struggling with a mental health disorder, Charlie Health is here to help. Charlie Health’s virtual Intensive Outpatient Program (IOP) provides more than once-weekly mental health treatment for dealing with serious mental health conditions. Our expert clinicians incorporate evidence-based therapies into individual counseling, family therapy, and group sessions. With treatment, managing your mental health is possible. Fill out the form below or give us a call to start healing today.