How Parental Burnout Affects Mental Health—and What to Do About It

Expert-approved tips for parents to manage the mental, emotional, and physical symptoms of parental burnout.

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Parental burnout refers to the mental, emotional, and physical fatigue that stems from the stress of being a parent. It involves overwhelming exhaustion, emotionally distancing yourself from your child, and feeling like an ineffective parent.

If this sounds familiar, know that you’re not alone. “Parental burnout is more common than many people realize,” says Bree Williams, a Charlie Health Group Facilitator. “While the exact prevalence varies depending on factors such as location and family dynamics, research suggests it affects anywhere from 20% to 40% of parents globally.”

Below, we review common signs of parental burnout and five ways that talk therapy can help reduce symptoms, improve your quality of life, and make parenting more rewarding. 

Who’s at risk of parental burnout? 

The term “burnout” was originally a reference to high-pressure and helping professions, such as lawyers, physicians, and social workers. When you think about it, the parental role checks both those boxes. Parents are responsible for the not-so-simple tasks of nurturing, protecting, and guiding their children through life. And for parents who are juggling caregiving, careers, and household chores, burnout can almost feel inevitable at times. 

According to Williams, certain types of parents may have a higher risk of burnout. These include: 

1. Single parents

Research shows that nearly one-fourth of all U.S. children live in single-parent households. For single parents, increased financial responsibility, co-parenting stress, and limited personal time and space may all contribute to an increased risk of burnout.

2. Parents of children with children with disabilities

Having a child with physical or emotional demands can be incredibly overwhelming, especially without access to a strong support system. Caregivers of children with disabilities, such as autism spectrum disorder (ASD) and attention-deficit/hyperactivity disorder (ADHD), may experience more psychological distress than caregivers of typically developing children. 

3. Parents with limited support

Parents who don’t have access to reliable support systems may experience burnout more acutely. Everyone’s support system looks different but may include a combination of friends, family, neighbors, fellow parents, and professional child care. 

Parental burnout symptoms

“Parental burnout often creeps in slowly, making it hard to identify at first,” says Williams. However, there are some clear signs that you may be struggling with your mental health and overall well-being. Here are seven common parental burnout symptoms.

1. Extreme exhaustion 

Burnout can cause extreme mental and physical fatigue, including emotional exhaustion. You may feel completely drained, even after a nap or a full night’s rest. 

2. Anger and irritability 

A short temper, being quick to snap, and feeling unusually frustrated with your children or partner may all be symptoms of parental burnout. 

3. Limited patience 

Parenting requires patience, especially when you have young children. When you’re suffering from burnout, it can be hard to find the patience to manage everyday challenges. 

4. Detachment from parenting 

This involves feeling disconnected from your children or guilty about not enjoying parenting. You may even be questioning your ability to parent, if you should be parenting, or feel like parenting is more exhausting than rewarding, if rewarding at all.

5. Feeling guilty 

Burnout can cause feelings of guilt, inadequacy, and shame over not being the perfect parent — even when you’re doing your very best. 

6. Decreased productivity

It’s normal to feel like you don’t have enough hours in the day to accomplish everything you want to do. However, if you’re having trouble completing the usual tasks, like making breakfast or folding laundry, you may be showing signs of burnout. 

7. Physical concerns 

Headaches, fatigue, insomnia, and changes in appetite can all be physical signs of severe burnout. 

How talk therapy can help you manage parental burnout 

Parents who are struggling with burnout or other mental health symptoms shouldn’t hesitate to seek professional help. When unmanaged, parental burnout can escalate into mental health concerns such as anxiety and depression. Parenting stress and other symptoms of burnout can even affect your relationship with your children and your overall family dynamic. 

The good news is working with a therapist is an effective way to reduce parental stress and build a more balanced future for yourself and your family. There’s no such thing as a perfect parent, and by showing up for yourself, you are working toward being the best parent you can be.  

Through techniques like cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT), you can learn to better understand the link between your emotions, thoughts, and behaviors. Group therapy and support groups can also be helpful tools, especially if you’re a single parent or working parent. “These provide the opportunity to connect with others who understand what you’re going through and offer mutual support and parenting advice,” adds Williams. Here are 5 ways that working with a therapist can provide you with the skills to more effectively address parental burnout. 

1. Learn how to process your emotions

If you’re struggling with extreme mood swings or irritability, talk therapy can help you learn to understand and manage your emotions. “Therapy allows parents to vent frustrations, work through feelings of guilt or shame, and identify the root causes of their burnout,” explains Williams.

2. Focus on self-care

Parents are often so focused on their families that they can sometimes forget to prioritize their own needs. However, it’s important to remember that self-care is essential to your health and well-being. Practical tips include trying to prioritize sleep, eating nutritious foods, and finding time for physical activity each day.

3. Develop healthier coping mechanisms 

If you feel stuck in a harmful cycle of distressing emotions and behaviors, you may benefit from developing some new coping mechanisms. According to Williams, therapy can “equip parents with tools to manage stress, improve communication, and establish healthy boundaries.” A few examples of coping mechanisms include mindfulness, journaling, and problem-solving techniques.

4. Improve your problem-solving skills 

Talk therapy can help you uncover specific problems and develop the skills to address them. For example, if your child’s bedtime routine has become a serious source of stress, therapy can help you better manage your family’s time in the evening or set more realistic expectations for navigating the nightly transition. 

5. Build emotional resilience 

Resilience is the ability to bounce back from challenging or difficult situations. When people build emotional capacity and become more emotionally resilient, they know how to acknowledge their feelings and respond in a constructive way. “Therapy can help parents reframe their mindset, rediscover the joys of parenting, and develop a healthier balance between their roles and identities,” says Williams. 

Treat parental burnout with Charlie Health

In today’s society, more and more people are talking about the feeling of burnout. If you feel overwhelmingly exhausted, stressed, stuck in survival mode, or are feeling continuously disconnected  from your child or parenting role, it might be time to speak with a mental health professional.

Charlie Health’s personalized virtual Intensive Outpatient Program (IOP) offers mental health treatment for complex mental health struggles, including parental burnout, chronic stress, postpartum depression, and more. We combine group sessions, individual counseling, and family therapy to create a treatment plan that prioritizes you and your needs. If you’re ready to feel better, complete this short form to get started today.